Let's not count our proverbial eggs before they are fertilized!

I will let my wife tell you, that I am probably one of the world's most optimistic people. I search for (and often find) the good in everybody and everything. And even when I come across some bad... I would much rather focus on something else, and keep reminding myself of the good.
Why am I bragging? I just want to let the irony of my next actions really set in with you.
I do what any good supportive husband would do.

"Let's not get excited until we see a Dr."
"There is such thing as a false positive... I saw it on the Internet, so it must be true."
"We don't know for sure"
"The miscarriage rate for first-time pregnancies is 15%, and it jumps to 60% in women with PCOS"

I could have ( and should have) stopped with the first one. That was all I NEEDED to say. That's all I really wanted.
Because of what we had been told, I suddenly adopted the motto: Hope for the best, but expect the worst.
Where was my optimism? Where was that good? Somewhere between "Honey, I'm home" and "Honey, I'm pregnant" I had wandered away from that sunny-side-of-the-street I had so faithfully been walking down most of my life.

Don't get me wrong, I wasn't hoping for the worst, but the geek inside of me had to know every possible outcome, and the chances of each. I shared some things with her, but tried not to say too much. I just wanted to be realistic.

We call the doctor for a confirmation appointment, and she says don't even come in, go straight to the OB/GYN.

So, it's off to the OB we go...

Stop holding your breath...(and I will actually take one)

For those waiting on an answer to the question at the end of the previous post... I apologize.
I have no answer. I don't know how we got here. Never-the-less... HERE , we are.

So when my brain stopped using all the oxygen in the room to try and wrap itself around this little bit of news, I was able to take in a breath and try to formulate a response. I didn't have one. And never really have come up with an initial response.
Oh, sure , I have responded. But after some time and other things have let me think, and dwell on it. But as far as an intial response. I got bupkis.
person 1: So... tell me exactly what your husband said when you told him you were pregnant?
(awkward silence)
..(more silence)
person 1: Hey, I asked you to tell me what he said...
person 2: I just told you... twice!

Ok, so I got around to saying something about 'There is no other person in the world, I would rather have a baby with!'
No, I didn't say that, but that sounds good.
Hey honey are you reading this?

A few minutes later

A hug... some tears...
me: "Why are you crying?"
her: "Because I don't know how I feel."

Neither do I, though I had plenty of feelings to choose from!
fear, apprehension, disbelief, shock, puzzlement, freaked out, and somewhere in there a tinge of excitement.
Not quite in that order... actually all at the same time.

What do you say to your wife when she tells you she is pregnant and then starts crying in your arms?

Sorry...
I won't let it happen again...
Rub some dirt on it, you'll be ok, now get back out there and win!

None of these seemed to fit, and actually that last one should be in another blog somewhere.
Ok... so how did this happen?

...thank you captain obvious, that's not what I meant...

First we were told:"It is impossible, you cannot have kids, it can't happen, don't expect it"
Then we were told:"Ok, it is possible with major medical intervention, surgery, drugs, etc., and still only about a 60-80% chance "

So... here we are 10 years of marriage, no surgery, no drugs, no fertility treatments, we have resigned ourselve to the fact that it is not for us. Got used to a lifestyle that didn't include children. Even convinced ourselves strongly that we didn't want any of our own.

Of course, through out the years one or the other would start to feel an inclination, but never at the same time, and it never lasted long.
So, how did we end up here?

Thursday Jan 18,2007

"I'm trying to work here, woman!!"

I didn't actually say that, but after 5 calls in about 2 hours... I wanted to.

I believe I said: "I'll call you when I am on my way home," at least 15 times.

I told her a while back that January was going to be busy at work, and a lot of hours would be expected. I even forwarded an e-mail from my boss explaining as such.

Ok After 9:00pm , I finally walk in the door.

me: "Ok, why can't we go to that convention in August?"

her: "Cause I can't fly when I am 8 months pregnant."

me: "... ... ... "